Tell his story.
Because it is so tightly intertwined with my own.
But it chafes to do so.
Because it is complicated.
Because our relationship began at a painful rupture in my life and because he reacquainted me with my dark side.
And as we know, this blog is about the light and not the dark.
But I have a dark side.
It is not murderously dark or criminally dark.
Not even that interestingly dark.
Just unattractively so. Yeah, quite ugly.
Today I got my iPod back onto shuffle.
I love Cat Stevens with a fiery passion but not so much that the one track over and over and over again wouldn't drive me insane.
So I have gone without my tunes for quite some time now.
And today I managed to fight my way through the tecno jungle and reset my iPod so that it behaves.
I listened to my tunes, the grand, heart swelling ones as I walked the dogs.
I was mightily moved.
I walked and snivelled and snotted quite a bit.
One track is the one that I would like to make my final departure to.
I have thought about that. You know, the inevitable.
Because?......because it is the sweetest sound. The angels probably hear it and chuck away their harps. To me this music sums it up, to me it says that the very best and the very worst of humanity is usually contained within each of us.
Life is this exquisite blend of darkness and light.
I read a blogpost where the blogger referred to their life as a forest. And how they would choose to make it a forest of love rather than a forest of fear and doubt.
I loved that idea.
Life as a forest.
It suggests to me something fecund and fragrant. Full of sunlight and shadow.
Full of foliage and birdsong and unseen rustling critters.
But possibly wolves and bears.
Oh and now the iPod is fixed....music too.
I walk eternally, in a forest, with my brother. He shuffled off a while ago but in a forest fragrant with pine we still walk and talk of places we called home.
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