But in my defence this is how it goes for me. This is the value of her courses....for me; that they shift my perspective, just a little bit, and set me off renewed and refreshed. I learn what I need to learn.
It was the barefoot practice that did it.
The moment with my feet on a patio slab where my perspective shifted a la earthquake effect.
I realised that there are practices that I do not practice- ever or very rarely even though I know they bring huge benefits. It seems I cannot listen and act on that beneficent voice inside by head but need someone else to voice it for me. How incredibly daft.
sardine tins painted using the 30 minute timer practice
One valuable practice: reading. Takes time.
And this week I made time.
Books and bloggy stuff and somewhere in amongst this weeks reading material I came across the idea, not for the first time, of extreme self care.
It is an idea that hangs in the interwebyworld like pollen in the air, as pervasive, equally irritating but more visible.
As a person who is not good at moderate self care this idea does not sit well with me.
I get holes in my socks because I forget to cut my toe nails.
Squirm. Too much information?? I know.
But I wondered what it would be like to take care of self as one would take care of a beloved.
As part of my 'information in' practice I listened to a podcast by someone new to me Kristoffer Hughes who follows a druids path. He spoke of living life with an understanding of the death to come. He spoke about a new health mandate in the U.S. to medicate for grief that persists beyond 14 days!! And he urges, far more rationally,to scream, to howl at the loss of a loved one.
There is beauty, there is magic in life and in death... he says.
I believe it.
But the pain of loss is real.
As the sentient beings that we are it is a pain to be experienced not medicated away.
This I also believe.
In fact I know.
So howl at the moon, the stars, at anything for as long as you must but, hold someones hand. Yes: let's hold hands.
Sorry, sorry. I wandered off. Kristoffer's message moved beyond the painful bit, and this is the bit I walked away with; he urged us to live life bright. To shine like a diamond because this life matters. What we do matters.The colour, the joy, the music, the touch that we each uniquely bring, matters.
So coming back around to the beginning, tying it all up with a bow:-
The practice of extreme self care that I practiced today was to joyfully play in my studio with colours that make my heart sing, to connect with the couple who want a funky baby blanket for their 10th grandchild and to arrange another craft date with my monster-making friend and to give a chandelier crystal to a lady who was searching, and not finding, a small light refracting crystal to hang in her window.
Today was, I feel, a bright shiny day.
Oh yes, and my socks are safe
I wish bright, shiny days to you all and when you need a hand to hold I hope you find one warm and strong. xxx